Noodles: Mysterious, Fat, Gay, and Perhaps Able to Travel Through Interdimensional Phase Space.

I do realize that this was posted on the Milwaukee Skateboarding site, and technically we aren’t supposed to put anything up unless it is relating to cats, bars or something gay, but I wanted to make sure everyone is informed about the current state of affairs over at Cream City skatepark.

Milwaukee Wisconsin’s Cream City Skatepark has recently fallen victim to the imaginative storytelling tactics of the news media. As you may know, Cream City was the focal point of a television newscast and newspaper article regarding the bust of a drug ring in Milwaukee. Cream City Skatepark has never, nor will it ever be involved in any illegal activity. The park was not charged in the case whatsoever. Our business is skateboarding, not drugs. This story was simply an over dramatized attempt to create a frenzy surrounding the park. Unfortunately, it has succeeded. Despite the rumors and lies floating around, we are open for business and working hard to clear our name. With our local skaters rallying behind us, we hope to come out on top.
Over the past 2 years we have worked hard to earn the reputation of being one of the best skater owned and operated parks in the Midwest. With the addition of a new owner in progress, we look forward to continued success and great skateboarding. Check out for an updated schedule of demos and events.
Thanks for your support in helping us clear the air.

Bill Kaschner
Owner, Cream City Skatepark

There you have it.

On a lighter note, I ran across this very exciting story online with an excellent picture to accompany it. Now I will share it with you, the skateboarder.

“In 2003 my sister’s cat Boris came to stay with us for the summer. Boris is a large black cat, longer than Noodles by several inches, but very shy. When he arrived we put him in a spare room with food and litter box so he could get used to his surroundings in peace. Noodles, however, wanted to meet our new house guest. He scratched at the door to Boris’s room until we finally let him in (under close supervision, in case there was a fight). Noodles was friendly and eventually Boris warmed up to him. Sparky mostly ignored Boris; while Truman, being naturally skittish, steered clear of him. Once Boris was comfortable roaming around the house, he and Noodles hung out together. We did not know the extent of the relationship until my wife observed them in the act of love. Apparently, Noodles is gay. After this was revealed we started referring to them as David and Keith. At the end of the summer Boris moved back in with my sister, and now Noodles is separated from the love of his life. Sparky and Truman, by the way, apparently made it clear to Noodles early on that they were straight because we have never seen anything going on between them and Noodles. Actually, I think Truman is a bit of a homophobe by the obvious discomfort he showed around the couple.”

Later nerds.