Tapirs In Space

Old Dude Night @ Cream City
As promised, here are the photos I took at Old Dude Night this past Wednesday. I took these with this tiny new slave flash I got to go with my tiny point and shoot digital camera. That should explain why the quality isn’t the best, but considering what I was shooting with, I think they turned out pretty good.

First off, you have to test the set up! Nothing better than a solid picture of my dog looking like a zombie just in time for all hallows. We also got Tim wearing the mask he wears when goes for anonymous sex in men’s bathrooms at rest stops.

Skate photos! First off we have the Captain Bitter (Nathan Heilberger) launching out of the quarterpipe, avoiding Canada, and taking it directly to a wallride into the bank. On the right is Mr. Twister (Bill Kaschner) doing a kickflip indy off the hip. After I showed him this picture he only had this to say: “Damn, that’s gay”.

Finally we have Tim Olson getting into the full spirit of Old Dude Night doing a properly tweaked airwalk off the hip. This is exactly what is encouraged on Wednesday nights. Check your frontside flips at the door, please.

This is HUGE news I’ve failed to mention here. I’ve had the crappiest cell phone ever for a long time. For the last few months if it sustained even the smallest amount of trauma it would turn off. As mentioned previously on the site, Lord Cru had spent this entire last summer becoming a huge douche. What does any respectable douche need? A Blackberry! That means Cru was left with a relatively new and high tech phone without a home. You can see where I’m going with this…as the proud new owner of said phone I’ve been exploring the options it presents. One such option is: I can use any ring tone I want for the alarm clock feature. This morning I awoke to a beautiful MIDI rendition of Raining Blood. Such an ominous and entirely proper way to being the workday, that is for sure.

Speaking of Slayer, I hope you’re all breaking out your jean jackets, because this is the perfect time of year to be listening to Reign in Blood. Whenever I listen to it, all I can imagine is heshers wearing dirty jean jackets drinking Schaefers or Heinemanns (pull tab tops) around a bonfire somewhere in a fall time forest. (They told their mothers they were sleeping over at Rick’s house.) They have a boombox blaring Altar of Sacrifice and fancy themselves budding Satanists via the rituals of scratching “666” in their late 80’s high school desktops and totally blowing the janitor’s mind. Yeah, a lot of records I listen to have elaborate made up back stories in my mind to go with them. Does that make me crazy?

Ah, TGI Fridays, the time every nine to fiver lives for. Reports are showing that Mini-Bee is leaving the wastelands of suburban Chicago and taking it up to Milwaukee. Obviously that means a MP visit is in store. Just like Steve requested, I’m going to make it a night of Budweiser (sorry Pabst) and Levitra. Where ever that takes me I will, as they say, go with the flow. Cru has made the prediction that this weekend will be especially epic. He said he can feel it in his bones(r).

Weather.com is telling me that Jesus is using his magic to provide us with absolutely perfect skateboarding temperatures and clear skies for the entire weekend. I’m guessing that means we will get fourteen wallrides, six polejams, three late shove its, one saran wrap, and fifty seven no complies on tape. Can’t wait!

Some questions remain though, will Xydar make an appearance?? Will first contact be made with the Papoose?? Will we meet our trick quota?? Will butt cheeks be grinded together while standing inside a hula hoop?? Will Mini-Bee disappear for hours at a time?? Will Lord Cru visit Estabrook park for something besides fishing?? Tune in Monday for the weekend report.

Site News
Well crap, looks like I finally went through the pending video review queue and accepted some reviews, rejected more. Sometimes I forget that that part of the site even exists. A lot of the reviews on there are embarrassingly bad, that much is obvious, but if you think those are bad, you should see the ones I reject. Anyway, I was pretty stoked to see a lot of the new reviews waiting for me to look at were of old videos that kids care nothing about. So stoked that I added some soundtrack listings too. Not that anyone reading the front page stuff should care about crap like that, but that kind of stuff brings so many people to the site through google searches. More people = more fun.

Toby brought it to my attention that the The Skateboard Mag site linked to wiskate yesterday. Specifically his photo montage of contest skater portraits. Why anyone at the Skateboard Mag would be reading this site, I will never guess, but regardless, it’s really appreciated. Speaking of linking action, If any of you out there have websites it would be radical if you’d link to wiskate to help us get back to our former glory. We will of course return the favor. Email me if you’re interested.

Email (Lack Thereof)
Big Pete (I think) was feeling sorry for us, and took a little pity and threw an email in our direction. “Check out the video of a toilet trained cat on the homepage!” Obviously he is in touch with the needs of Tim and I. I haven’t had a chance to check out the video yet, but needless to day, I’m extremely interested.

As always, send your stupid emails here.

Self Promotion
I’m going to be having photos in this show at the Milwaukee Art Museum next Friday. (You know, that building downtown, it looks like a weird boat and there’s a double set in front of it.) How I got tangled up in all this, I’ll never know, but it’s going to be fun. There will be drinks if you can’t handle being around all that artiness sober, so don’t worry.

The next question is will I have my stuff done on time for it? Will I have time to make it to the strip club (Silk!) for Staci’s birthday party afterwards? Will Lord Cru be there and add more cougars to his Blackberry contact list? Seems like I like to ask a lot of rhetorical questions today.

Classic wiskate.com post #1
I’ve been meaning to do this for awhile since recently the front page posts are coming fast and furious and perhaps people are missing stuff. Plus there’s a ton of good old stuff in the archives that is really worth a second look. Today I finally figured out how to link to specific posts, so here we go.

Tim whipped up this doozy of a post in December of 2004. “How many of you play RPG’s on your PS2 or Gamecube or XBOX or Intellivision? How many of you have had a handjob from an inexperienced girl? If you have, then you most likely have experienced JOBD. What is JOBD, you ask?”

Click here to find out all you will ever need to know about JOBD!!

Photo of the day #15

Another set of half frame photos. Another piece of media from one of the Northern Athletik trips to Tampa for that one skating contest. This one features Mr. Twister (Top 3) and The Cuz getting super romantic with a unicorn that was also along for the ride. Man, did that ‘corn love singing along with whatever shitty rap song was on in the car.

Remember when Crailtap had that fake ass unicorn phase but kept putting up pictures of the Pegasus? That was so lame. Learn the damn difference guys!